


The Change

by Fairheads, Liz_87



Category: Casualty (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:07:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28268121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fairheads/pseuds/Fairheads, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liz_87/pseuds/Liz_87
Summary: AU. Duffy isn't herself and Charlie tries to get to the bottom of why.
Relationships: Lisa "Duffy" Duffin/Charlie Fairhead
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

Not again! She sighed inwardly as she sat up in bed. Glancing at the clock revealed it was 2.36am. Slipping from the bed she headed through to the bathroom, grabbing some fresh night clothes on the way past her drawers. Reaching the sink she stared at herself in the mirror. She was bathed in sweat.

Charlie rolled over in his sleep and sensed that Duffy wasn’t there. There had been a few times he’d woken up to find her gone recently.

Running a flannel under the freezing cold tap she stripped off her damp clothes and pressed the cloth to her burning skin, sighed at the blessed relief it gave.

Charlie wanted to get up and check on her, but knew she’d tell him to go back to bed, whatever it was. So he decided to wait until she returned.

It was several minutes before she felt comfortable again. She redressed and crept back into the bedroom.

His hand reached for her, “You okay baby?” He mumbled.

"You should be asleep!" She retorted.

He was a little taken aback by her response, but was too tired to argue and instead settled on a sleepy, “I love you.”

"Love you too." She replied, though she lay on the furthest edge of the bed away from him, the covers scrunched up beside her as she lay facing the wall.

Charlie’s arm lay in between them, where he’d tried and failed to reach her. She hadn’t been herself for a little while, but even he knew, the middle of the night was not the time to bring it up. He fell asleep again quickly, exhausted from his last shift.

She lay staring at the wall until she heard his snores once more. It was only then that she allowed herself to cry.

When Charlie woke early the next morning, Duffy wasn’t there.

She was sat in the garden, her dressing gown loosely wrapped around herself, drinking a cup of coffee to try and kickstart her sluggish system.

Pulling his own dressing gown on, Charlie padded downstairs and spotted her out of the kitchen window. Taking his own cup of coffee, he went out to join her. “Morning gorgeous,” He whispered, bending down to kiss her cheek.

She mumbled a greeting in reply.

He sat down next to her, his eyes falling to her gaping dressing gown.

After a few moments she noticed the direction of his gaze. Rolling her eyes she harrumphed and pulled her gown closed.

Charlie felt bad, he hadn’t meant to make her feel uncomfortable. “You okay?” He asked tentatively.

"Fine." She replied shortly.

“You didn’t sleep well again?”

"I didn't mean to wake you."

“It’s okay. Are you sick?”

"No!" She burst back sharply. "I'm fine, just working odd shifts." She added as an afterthought.

Charlie’s brow wrinkled in confusion for a moment, before once again letting it go. He leaned to wrap his arm around her shoulders. “Shall we have a relaxing evening tonight, after our shift?”

"If that's what you want..." She replied non-committally.

“We don’t have to do anything special. I just thought you might like a bath, and cuddles on the sofa?”

"OK."

“We don’t have to...” He shrugged, he thought it would have been a nice suggestion normally, but now he wasn’t so sure. He let his arm drop and moved further away.

She took the opportunity to get up from the bench. "Best get ready for work."

He was left sitting there for a few moments, and then went to go and get ready too.

Once she was ready Duffy went and sat in her car, turning the fans on full pelt.

Charlie was baffled. When he had finished getting ready, he locked the house and tapped on her car window. “Room for me? Do you want to go in separately?”

There was a click as the central locking unlocked.

Charlie smiled and climbed in beside her. “Blimey, it’s cold in here.” He shivered.

"If you don't like it then you can drive yourself to work..!" She muttered as she started the engine.

“Duffy...” He said softly.

"My car, my rules."

Charlie stared out of the window silently, as she drove them into work - he had a feeling it was going to be a long shift!

Not content with the fan being on Duffy also rolled down the window.

Charlie was running through possible medical reasons for her behaviour... Temperature, feeling nauseous, hot flush? He felt it was his duty, as her boss, to check she was fit enough for work. As she parked up, “Duffy, are you sure you’re okay to work? I can get cover if you aren’t feeling well?”

"I'm fine!" She shot back, getting out the car and slamming the door shut.

He held his hands up in defence, as she entered the department without him or even a hint of a goodbye. Charlie walked to his office, wondering what he’d done to upset her so much. He had a stack of paperwork to sort before he could help on the floor.

As a result Duffy took charge of the nursing team.

After he had completed his admin tasks, he went to see what was happening in the department.

Louise glanced up from the nurses desk, relief filling her face as she saw Charlie. "Are you here to relieve the tyrant?" She remarked without thinking.

Charlie’s expression was quizzical, but soon turned serious. “I’m not sure that’s how you should speak about a senior member of staff! What’s happened?”

"Well maybe she should stop yelling at us when we get something wrong because she didn't explain herself properly!"

Charlie was confused, that didn’t sound like Duffy at all. “What happened?”

"She didn't copy down the dosages onto the file and then I got grief from Mrs Beauchamp about it so I went back to Duffy and she swore blind she had and then got mad saying I must have lost it!"

Charlie continued to look confused, “That doesn’t sound like something Duffy would do... Are you sure?”

"Why does no-one believe me?! She's cracking up I swear!"

“Louise, I know you’re feeling upset, but you don’t need to make it personal. I will speak to them about what happened.”

"She's got a point..." Robyn added gently.

Charlie looked at Robyn, as Louise left. “What happened?”

"It's mostly just daft little things she's missing. She seems distracted and keeps disappearing."

He nodded, she was definitely not herself. “Leave it with me...”

"Thanks. She's probably just not feeling well or something." Robyn shrugged.

He exhaled, just as Connie called him into her office.

"Close the door." Connie instructed as she sat at her desk.

Charlie did as she told, and sat down as she motioned to the chair opposite her.

"Care to explain the sub-par performance of your nursing staff today..?" Connie demanded.

“I haven’t had chance to look into it yet...”

"I would have spoken to Nurse Duffin myself but she seems to have gone awol again."

“What do you mean?”

"Well is it any wonder your nursing team is falling over itself when no-one can find the senior nurse on shift?"

“Leave it with me.”

"If you're sure you can handle it..?" She replied, looking unconvinced.

“My staff, my problem.” He asserted.

"Hmm..."

“What are you trying to say Mrs Beauchamp?”

"I'd hate to see the professional and the personal getting mixed up."

“That isn’t and never has been a problem.”

"Off you go then..!" She replied dismissively.

Charlie turned to leave, biting his tongue. When he finally tracked down Duffy she was exiting the ladies toilet. “Hi...” He started.

"Oh! Hi..." She replied, trying to discretely move her hand from where it had been rubbing at her lower abdomen.

“Can we talk?”

"Problem?"

“Just need to go over a few things... My office?” He suggested.

"Sure..." She replied, concealing a wince as she moved to follow him.

Once inside, he shut the door. “How has this morning been?”

"Fine. Why?"

“Something about dosages missing on a file..?”

"They were there! Louise misplaced them." Duffy asserted.

Charlie looked puzzled, “Where would they be, if they weren't on that chart?”

"How should I know?!" She replied, agitated.

“Did you write the chart?”

"Of course I did, why wouldn't I? Its basic stuff." She was getting offended by his questioning of her.

“Then it would be your writing on the chart... But the dosage wasn’t there when Louise gave it to Mrs Beauchamp?”

"She must have picked up the wrong chart." Duffy retorted. "Are we done because I have lots to be getting on with.?!"

“Do you need to take some time? You’ve had a lot on your plate...”

"I can cope just fine!" She snapped.

Charlie rubbed his neck, clearly frustrated. “I’m only trying to help.” He whispered, as she turned to walk out.

Hearing the sadness in his voice she paused and turned back round to face him once more.

He met her gaze, and tried to convey his heartfelt concern.

She sighed, softening slightly as he placed his arms around her.

He didn’t speak, he just held her and kissed the top of her head.

After a few moments he moved his hand to tilt her chin up so he could kiss her properly yet tenderly.

She melted under his touch.

He was relieved that she had connected with him, if only for this moment, it had been a strange few weeks.

Taking a chance he stroked his hands down her sides as she continued to kiss him. “We better get out there...” He said, remembering Mrs Beauchamp’s earlier words.

"Yeh, I'll just be a minute and then I'll join you out there." She replied, moving back towards the door.

He raised his eyebrows, confused again. He bent down to kiss her again. “Tonight, you and me quality time?” He suggested again, hoping it would be received slightly better than that morning.

"Sure. Great." She replied, giving him a slightly forced smile before she opened the door and dashed off back in the direction she'd come from.

Charlie shook his head, something was wrong, he wished she’d let him in.

A little while later Duffy pulled Elle aside at the start of the doctor's shift. "I need a favour..." She whispered, glancing around to ensure she wasn't overheard.

“Sure, what is it Duffy?” Elle was signing off a chart and hadn’t looked up.

"Can we talk somewhere more private?"

Elle looked up, noticing Duffy’s awkward demeanour. “Sure, let’s go through here.” She pointed to the stockroom, holding the door open for her.

"Thanks." Once the door was closed behind them Duffy reached into her pocket and pulled out a prescription form. "Will you sign this for me?" She asked, handing the paper to the other woman.

“What is this? Is it for you?” Elle took the form from her, reading over the detail.

"Yeh." It was for a course of antibiotics for a UTI. "Please can we keep this between us..?"

“Did you run a urine test?” Elle asked her.

"I know what's wrong..! Look if you don't want to do it I'll find someone else..!" Duffy reached out to take the form back.

“Duffy... You know it’s my job... I can’t prescribe without investigation. Let me help, let’s run a screen, and I promise I’ll sign it straight off.”

"I'd rather not have my private medical business yelled all over the department. I'm fully capable of diagnosing a UTI. All I need you to do is sign the prescription because I can't."

“It would be private...” Elle relented and signed the prescription. “Any blood or reoccurrence, you get checked, agreed?”

"Of course." Duffy rolled her eyes, omitting the fact that this was the third course of antibiotics she'd needed in as many months. "Thanks for this." She took the prescription and placed it back in her pocket.

“Are you okay?” Elle asked softly, staring straight at her.

"I'm fine. Or I will be once these kick in." Duffy forced a smile, tapping her pocket.

Elle touched her arm, “If I can help with anything, you know where I am. Anything at all.”

"Thanks. I best get back to work."

Later on, Charlie watched Duffy grimace as she bent down to pick up some medical supplies. He caught her eye as she noticed him.

"Getting old..!" She attempted to joke as her knees creaked loudly.

He smiled, but didn’t believe her.

Turning away to place the supplies on the shelf Duffy sighed silently. Everything seemed to constantly ache these days despite her taking frequent painkillers.

Their shift finished without any further problems, Charlie had managed to get Connie back on side by reassuring her it was sorted and things seemed better between Louise and Duffy.

Neither spoke much as Duffy drove home. It had been a long shift.

Suddenly the car behind them started honking loudly, the traffic light had been green for several seconds but Duffy hadn't noticed.

Charlie assumed that she was tired, stressed or otherwise preoccupied, so didn’t make comment.

She took several more seconds to respond to the honking by which time the traffic lights were starting to change back towards red. "Alright!" She yelled out the window as she slammed her foot onto the accelerator just as the light turned red.

Her bag flung off the backseat onto the floor, she accelerated with such force.

Several cars honked their horns and screeched their breaks as she narrowly avoided colliding with them as she tore across the junction.

Charlie exhaled, he hadn’t realised he had been holding his breath.

"Learn to drive!" Duffy yelled out the window.

“Duffy...” Charlie whispered, it was clearly her fault.

"What?!"

He didn’t reply, and she soon pulled onto their road, parking on the drive.

She got out the car, slamming the door shut behind her.

He followed her inside, with her handbag.

She halted in the hallway panicking as she realised she didn't have her bag.

He held it out for her, it was slightly open, but he hadn’t noticed the contents.

She snatched it from him, plowing through with increasing agitation.

He stood watching her, completely bewildered.

"Where's my diary?!" She muttered, upending the bag, the contents cascading onto the hall floor.

Charlie watched everything fall to the floor, her diary the last thing to clatter. He bent down to pick it up for her.

She quickly snatched it from him along with the medication she'd gotten Elle to prescribe.

“Duffy?” He looked up at her, concerned.

"Cuppa?" She asked, desperately stuffing the scattered contents from the floor back into her bag.

He placed his hand on her shoulder, trying to get her to slow down.

Without warning Duffy burst into tears.

He could feel her shoulders shake. He knelt down next to her, as she desperately tried to wipe her tears away and continued to pack her bag. “Come here love, it’s okay.” He ran his hands over her shoulders and arms, trying to get her to stop and turn to him.

She threw the bag down in frustration.

He looked at her, holding his arms open, and wondering if she would accept his comfort.

She lent against his chest, it felt like the whole world was crashing down around her!

He wrapped his arms around her and just held her again. He knew that in time, she would open up, and he would have to (as always) be patient until then.

She didn't move for several minutes, she couldn't seem to stop crying.

He stroked her hair, not wanting to move for fear of her not letting him in, despite it being very uncomfortable on the floor.

Finally she moved her head back slightly to look at him.

He smiled at her, no questions asked.

She attempted to get up but all her joints had gone stiff, the smallest movement tore a pained yelp from her lips.

He helped her up, wrapping her in a hug, when she was finally up. “Why don’t you go for a bath? I can bring your cuppa up?”

She nodded, moving slowly and with some difficulty towards the bathroom.

He noticed, and walked with her up the stairs slowly.

"I don't need help!" 

“Okay!” He held up his hands and retreated, watching her climb the remaining stairs with a pained expression.

By the time Charlie returned with a cup of tea Duffy was laid in the bath, holding her stomach.

“Do you need some painkillers?” He asked her softly.

She nodded. "Must have eaten something dodgy..."

“Duffy... I saw the meds...”

"It's nothing..."

He lifted his hands up exasperated, “They’re antibiotics, so it’s hardly nothing.”

"It's just a minor infection, nothing to worry about."

“UTI?” He guessed. “You can talk to me about stuff, you know.” He said softly, kneeling down next to the bath and holding his hand out to her.

"There's nothing to talk about."

“Do you want me to leave you alone?” He asked.

"It's your house too..." She shrugged.

“I’ll go and make some food.” He said wearily, standing up to go.

"OK."

Charlie went and busied himself in the kitchen, trying to prepare something she would enjoy. It saddened him that she seemed so out of sorts but wouldn't open up to him.

It was some time before he heard the water drain from the bath, he had almost finishing cooking her favourite dish.

She eventually returned downstairs wrapped in her dressing gown.

He turned around from serving the food, when he heard her arrive.

Her hair hung in damp waves around her face which was now devoid of make up.

“I made us some food...” He turned with a plate in each hand. He noticed how pale she looked and how it appeared like she had been crying again.

"Thanks." She managed a small smile.

He carried the plates over to the table, he had clearly made an effort with the cooking and presentation.

She sat down, running her fingers through her hair.

He passed her some cutlery, beginning to tuck in himself, whilst watching her intently.

She slowly, methodically, cut up her food.

It didn’t look like she was feeling hungry. Charlie just didn’t know what to say, he felt if he tried, she would put up walls or snap back at him.

She picked at her food, avoiding Charlie's gaze.

It was silent, until Charlie whispered, “I love you.” It explained how he felt the best and was the only thing he could think of to say.

Duffy glanced up, seemingly caught off guard by his comment.

He smiled weakly at her.

She smiled back at him.

He finished his dinner, but she’d barely made a start on hers.

He took his plate over to the sink, knowing she wouldn't like it if he stayed staring at her whilst she ate. He washed up, feeling disappointed that his efforts hadn’t helped.

She eventually managed to eat about half the meal he'd prepared for her.

“Did you find some painkillers?” He asked, placing a packet he had retrieved from the kitchen cupboard on the table.

"No, thanks." She lied, picking the packet up and removing two pills.

“Have you finished?” He asked, reaching for her plate.

"Yeh." She nodded, picking up her drink to swallow the medication.

He took it away, sighing inaudibly.

"It was lovely, thank you." She added over her shoulder.

He returned to her, placing his hands on her shoulders and massaging softly. As she slowly relaxed, he bent and quickly kissed her neck. “Cuddles?” He suggested.

She yawned, nodding her agreement to his suggestion.

“Let’s get you to bed,” He smiled kindly, holding his hand out for her to take.

She took his hand, allowing herself to be led upstairs.

Once settled, Charlie climbed into bed next to her.

She sighed softly as he began to massage her shoulders and back.

She had removed her dressing gown and wasn’t wearing anything, in the hope that she might stay cooler. Charlie worked his magic hands over her skin.

He slowly moved his hands lower, chancing his luck, smiling as she appeared receptive to his advances. He lingered on her butt, squeezing it, before running his hands over her legs. His fingers felt wonderful on her tired and aching legs. He massaged all the way down and back up again. She rolled onto her back.

Her eyelids were half closed and she had a blissful smile on her lips.

He couldn’t resist leaning down and kissing her lips.

She sighed softly against his lips, parting her own to allow his tongue to explore her mouth.

It seemed to be the only way he could communicate with her, he was gentle, but their kiss soon became more heated as it continued.

She could feel his need for her pressing against her thigh.

He held her breast as he kissed her.

She slid her hand between them, her fingers stroking his cock as it strained against the material of his joggers.

He moaned softly at her touch.

It had been some time since they'd last been intimate, he ached for her.

His fingertips tickled her upper thighs as she helped to remove his trousers.

She giggled softly at his actions.

“It’s so good to hear you giggle,” He whispered, lying down to kiss her.

"You tickled me..!" She continued to giggle.

“I’ve missed tickling you.” He muttered, his hands moving higher, his kisses heated.

She moaned softly against his lips.

He took that as a good sign, it had been weeks since they had slept together. Reaching between them, he positioned himself, still kissing her.

"Love you." She whispered between kisses.

“I love you too,” He whispered, as he entered her.

She sighed contentedly.

As he began to move, she gasped, her eyes widening, causing him to momentarily stop.

"I'm OK." She reassured him.

Charlie tried to believe her, and carried on, kissing down her neck, as he moved inside her.

Duffy closed her eyes, stroking her hands along Charlie's back as she tried to ignore the way her body was screaming at her.

Charlie had noticed that she was tense and when he caught sight of her face, she was grimacing slightly every time he moved. At first, he thought it was because she wasn’t relaxed, due to whatever was on her mind.

She shifted slightly, hoping the change of position would help.

It didn’t seem to help matters, in fact, it made it worse. Charlie noticed her expression and stopped, pulling out completely.

She opened her eyes. "Why did you stop?"

He lay down next to her, and stroked her cheek. “I don’t want to hurt you baby...” He whispered softly.

"I'm fine but if you don't want to then just say..!" She retorted before rolling over away from him.

He ran his hand over her back, “I do... I... I don’t think I turned you on enough first, and it looked like I was hurting you.”

"Excuses, excuses Charlie, just go to sleep!"

“Duffy...” He started, reaching for her, but she pulled away. Moving the sheet slightly, he noticed some blood from where she had be lying, “You’re bleeding...”

"Just leave me alone!" She retorted, curling up in a ball.

He tried to wrap his arms around her, but she was having none of it.

"Either stay on your side or go sleep on the sofa!"

Charlie sighed, lying back and running his hands over his head.

Duffy buried her face into her pillow, feeling tears threatening yet again.

He hated to see her like this, but didn’t know what to do.

She didn't want to push him away but she couldn't help it.

Charlie lay awake for hours, before finally falling into a restless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Duffy barely slept a wink, her entire body felt like it was on fire.

She had just dozed off when Charlie returned from the kitchen with a cup of tea for her.

She lay on the bed, the sheets kicked onto the floor, her skin flushed and damp.

“Morning,” He smiled, passing her the cup of tea.

She grunted softly as she rolled over.

He left her to wake up and went in the shower.

When he'd finished she was dressed in her dressing gown and stripping the sheets off the bed.

“I can do that...” He offered to help, standing with his towel wrapped around his waist.

"I don't need help, I'm not an invalid!"

He held up his hands in defence again, “I didn’t say you were.” He muttered. Turning away from her, he opened his drawers to get some clothes out, he could feel her looking at him.

"It's rude to mutter." She retorted.

He rolled his eyes at her, exasperated, and finished getting dressed.

She gathered the sheets and flounced out the room.

“Fucks sake!” Charlie muttered, after she had left, although Duffy heard.

"Fuck you Fairhead!" She spat back.

Charlie turned his back against the door, pressing his head against it and shutting his eyes. He hadn’t meant to lose his patience.

A few minutes later he heard the front door slam and her car engine start.

He watched from the window as she drove away.

Heaving a sigh he made his way downstairs. In her hurry to leave she'd left her bag open on the table in the hall. Her diary lay at the top.

He wondered where she was going and was torn between looking in the diary and respecting her privacy, he walked past it and then returned. He picked it up, running his fingers over the cover. He’d never broken her privacy before and it took ages before he turned the pages.

The first few pages held the usual contact details one would expect to find in a diary. Then came pages covering a week at a time, listing work shifts, birthdays and other events and appointments. Some pages also had a hastily scribbled asterix against one of the dates.

He wasn’t sure what the asterix was for, it didn’t seem to follow a pattern, but today’s date had one on it.

It was also the first one to appear for several pages.

He sighed, rubbing his neck and shut the diary. He was going to message her, but he noticed her phone was in her bag, so there was no point.

He really couldn't understand what was up with her lately, her mood seemed to fluctuate wildly. He sat down on the sofa. "Think Fairhead, think!" He muttered aloud.

His mind ran through many medical possibilities, until he finally stumbled upon the most likely one... Menopause. Why hadn’t he thought of that before?!

Of course! It made so much sense! He got back up from the sofa and retrieved the diary once more, working through it more methodically this time.

Everything had been fine up until a few months ago, but since then, there had been so many issues between them, at work, with her health.

Exploring further in her bag he found a number of prescriptions and some leaflets which had clearly been hastily folded up and ignored. “Oh Duffy...” He sighed, shaking his head softly. “I could've helped with all this.”

"You've stooped to going through a lady's handbag now have you..?" Accused a voice from the doorway.

Charlie jumped back, he hadn’t heard anyone come in.

Duffy lent against the doorframe, her arms folded across her chest as she scowled at him.

“I... I didn’t know where you’d gone... I...”

"Oh sorry, am I supposed to ask permission before I leave the house.?!" She retorted sarcastically.

“I’m sorry. Please can we just talk?”

"What about?" She still hadn't moved from the door.

“You, us, please... We can’t go on like this... Duffy?” He pleaded with her.

"There's nothing to talk about."

He was clearly stressed, repeatedly pulling at the back of his neck. “You’re not letting me in at the moment.”

"Because there isn't anything to let you in about. Why do you think there is..?"

“You haven’t been yourself for ages... Just come and sit with me, please.”

"Fine!" She rolled her eyes before reluctantly following him into the lounge.

He settled down on the sofa and she sat next to him. “Come here...” He held his arms out.

She sighed softly and lent into his embrace.

He stroked her hair, “I don’t want to fight with you sweetheart, I’m on your side.”

"Why were you going through my diary? What did you think I was up to?"

“I was just trying to understand, I shouldn’t have looked, I’m sorry about that. I thought you had an appointment or maybe you were meeting someone..?”

She pulled back, horrified. "You think I'm being unfaithful?!"

“I hope not... But I know I haven’t been the best husband recently, work’s taken over.”

"You hope not?! How dare you!" She sprung to her feet, anger written large across her features.

“Please don’t do this...” He stood up, reaching for her arms.

"Me?! You're the one who just accused me of having an affair!"

“I didn’t accuse you, I said I hoped you weren’t.” He was grateful that she hadn’t pulled her arms away completely.

"Well it's nice to know you have such faith in me! We've known each other a long time Charlie!"

“Argh!” He pressed his hands to his forehead. “I trust you, I trust you, I trust you.” He repeated, frustrated. “Where did you go?”

"For a drive. Would you like a list of the roads?"

He sat on the edge of the sofa, his face in his hands.

"I'll take that as a no..."

He shook his head. His eyes looked up to meet hers, he blinked, trying to rid them of threatening tears.

She met his gaze, all the anger inside her instantly evaporating.

“Please don’t shut me out. I’m right here, I'm not going anywhere.”

"There's nothing wrong..." She sighed, sinking into the sofa next to him.

“I think I know what’s happening, you don’t need to be embarrassed.” He whispered, pulling her into him.

"What are you talking about?"

“Menopause.” He just said it.

"What about it?" Duffy asked, dying a little inside, she really didn't want to be having this conversation...

“There are some things that have been happening, that could explain it...”

"You really want to have this conversation don't you..?" She cringed.

“We don’t have to, but I’m here if you want to. You can talk to me about things, I love you, none of this changes that.”

"It's private..."

“Private?” He raised his eyebrows.

"You wouldn't understand."

“Try me?”

"It's alright for you blokes..!"

“I know... We do have it easy...” He agreed.

"The worst you get is buying some 'vintage' car and copping off with a younger woman..!" A small smile played at the corner of her lips.

He grinned, “A very sexy younger woman.” He winked at her.

She chuckled softly at the predictableness of his reply.

“And you? What do you get..?” He encouraged her.

"Feeling like over the hill shit." She sighed.

“That good hey?” He joked, but then recognised, she was being serious.

She sighed again.

“I’m sorry about looking in your diary - that was totally wrong, I was frustrated but there’s no excuse. I’m sorry for pushing you to talk to me. And I’m sorry for hurting you last night.”

"It's not your fault I'm falling apart." She murmured sadly.

He reached for her hand, “Have you spoken to anyone about your symptoms?”

"What's the point? They'll just tell me that 'it's a normal part of aging'..."

“There are things that could help...”

"Oh here comes Nurse Fairhead..."

“I’m your husband too, and you’re struggling on your own with something, that I can support you with. We made that promise remember.”

"We said 'no sickness'..." She reminded him.

He kissed her, “You are impossible!” He teased.

"At least that hasn't changed."

“Hey, it’s going to be okay, we’ll work it out.” He lifted her chin up.

"Do we really have to talk about it..?" She asked awkwardly.

“No, we don’t have to. But normally we don’t fight as much, when you talk to me!”

"It's not exactly something I really want to be discussing with my husband and best friend..."

He looked hurt, but respected her wishes.

She sighed before getting up to go through to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee.

After a few moments, he went through to join her, standing against the doorway.

She hadn't noticed him so he took the chance to observe her.

She stood staring out the window, wringing her hands. Her thoughts were tumbling one over the other. She was touched that he was understanding and kind about what she was going through but a large part of her felt that she should be handling it better. It was a natural part of life so she shouldn't be getting in such a state over it.

He walked over to behind her, but she was deep in thought and didn’t notice.

The drink she'd made herself sat beside her going cold.

He kissed the back of her neck, she jumped suddenly.

She let out a little squeal, her hand knocking over the cup.

“Sorry... I didn’t mean to startle you.” He grabbed some kitchen towel and started wiping up the spillage.

"I shouldn't be drinking coffee anyway." She sighed.

He switched the kettle back on, preparing to make her another drink. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he kissed the back of her neck again. “Why’s that love?”

"Caffiene doesn't exactly help does it?"

“Maybe not...” He rested his head on her shoulder.

She reached up and stroked his cheek.

He turned to kiss her fingers, “I love you.” He breathed.

"Even when I'm a hormonal mess?"

“Most of all then!”

"I don't want everyone to know..." She eventually said after several minutes of silence.

“No one needs to know, just us.” She had covered his hands, which were still around her waist, with her own.

"I feel like hell..." She admitted quietly.

“Everywhere?” He whispered, interlocking his fingers with hers, desperately hoping she would keep talking.

"Here was me thinking puberty and childbirth were the worst it could get..!"

He didn’t say anything, just nuzzled and kissed her neck softly.

"That was a hell of a night though..!" She remarked as her mind wandered back.

“Childbirth?”

"Your face!" She giggled.

“And you’re worried about me knowing too much at the moment!” He joked.

"Hey! You promised you wouldn't look!" She pouted playfully.

“How was I meant to deliver a baby, if I didn’t look.!?”

"I don't know! That was your problem to figure out not mine!" She chuckled.

“I like that we share stuff, it doesn’t put me off you, you know...”

"There's sharing and then there's that..!" She snorted.

“Admittedly, it’s something I don’t need to repeat, but this current stuff, it doesn’t bother me, I promise.”

"Oh that won't be an issue ever again..!"

“Does that make you sad?”

"Not being able to have kids anymore?" She asked, her eyebrow raised.

“Yeah...”

"Oh trust me, having Paul well and truly put me off having any more kids!" She laughed darkly.

“And me!” He teased.

"Ryan hassled me for ages over it when we first got married." She revealed.

“Children?”

"Yeh."

She rarely spoke of Ryan to Charlie, but when she did it was usually some awful story, which was difficult to hear. “Did he put pressure on you?”

"It was part of the reason why we split up the first time around."

“I didn’t know that... I don’t like the idea of him pressuring you.”

"He had a child with someone else..." She mumbled.

“What do you mean?” He asked, looking directly at her.

"I wasn't willing to have his child so he went behind my back and found someone who was." She shrugged, attempting to hide how much it had hurt her.

Charlie inhaled quickly, “Duffy, after all these years... I didn’t know that. That’s unforgivable.”

"I only found out when Paul accidentally let it slip one day."

“I hate Ryan and how he treated you, it makes me so angry.” Charlie sighed.

"I know." She sighed, turning in his arms to face him.

He looked down at her, in his arms, and smiled, before kissing her quickly.

She smiled softly as they parted. "Is more children something you would have liked?" She asked in a whisper.

He shook his head, “I think we’re definitely through the baby stage, we’ll be grandparents before long. We have so much fun ahead of us.” He kissed her reassuringly.

"All the perks with none of the hard work and you can hand them back when they get grumpy!" She chuckled.

He nodded, brushing her hair from her face. “Sounds good to me!”

She smiled, fighting to suppress a yawn.

“Why don’t you go back to bed love? Rest while you can?” He encouraged.

"Will you join me?"

“I was going to run a few errands...” He told her.

"Oh... OK." Her smile wavered slightly and her eyes looked sad.

“I’ll come and join you up when I get back?” He suggested.

"I'd like that."

“It’s going to be okay.” He reassured her softly.

"Can I not just go to bed and wake up in a couple of years time when it's all over?" She sighed.

He smiled, shaking his head, “I’ll wake you up in a couple of hours though.”

She smiled softly, kissing him on the cheek before heading back upstairs.

Charlie finished cleaning the kitchen and then grabbed his coat and car keys, he had an idea up his sleeve.

After several disturbed nights Duffy fell asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Charlie disappeared for a few hours and returned with what he needed. As promised, he headed upstairs to their bedroom, finding Duffy curled up in a ball, fast asleep.

She'd clearly gotten too hot and kicked the covers off before becoming cold once more but being too asleep to retrieve them from the floor.

Charlie thought she looked so peaceful, he didn’t want to wake her.

Her feet were freezing cold so he picked up the duvet and gently draped it over her.

She let out a contented sigh in her sleep.

He went to leave, so she could sleep some more, when she mumbled to him.

Her eyelids fluttered open. "Come to bed." She whispered, her words becoming more coherent as she woke up more.

He removed his shoes and trousers and got into the bed next to her, her eyes had shut again but she reached for him.

Her hand slipped under his t-shirt, her fingers icy cold.

“Oof!” He exclaimed, gasping. “You’re freezing!”

Her eyes remained closed but an impish grin formed on her lips.

“You’re not meant to find that funny.” He chuckled, kissing the top of her head.

"You're snuggly and my hands are cold." She replied with a shrug.

He wrapped his arms around her, as she snuggled into him sleepily.

"Where you go?"

“I just had to pick some things up.” He whispered, not wanting to interrupt her sleep.

"OK." She replied sleepily.

It wasn’t long before she’d fallen asleep again, lying peacefully on his chest. He watched as her body rose and fell gently, she was finally relaxed.

The movement lulled him to sleep too and it was early afternoon before they were both awoken by their growling stomachs alerting them to the fact that neither had eaten since the night before.

He attempted to get out and make them some food, but she noticed he was leaving.

"Running away again..?" She giggled softly.

“Yeah, I’m so trapped here...” He teased.

"You poor boy..!" She grunted softly as she stretched on the bed.

“I was going to make us some food.” He smiled.

"Ok, you may leave..!" She waved her hand in a regal fashion, giggling mischievously.

He smirked and shook his head at her.

She stuck out her tongue before rolling back onto her front and closing her eyes again.

By the time Charlie had arrived back upstairs with a tray of food, she was fast asleep again. “Hey sleeping beauty.”

"Sorry." She yawned as her eyes slowly opened.

“Think you needed to catch up.” He placed the tray next to her.

"Mmm." She sat up and stretched her arms above her head.

“Hungry?” He asked.

"Yeh..." She chuckled as her stomach rumbled again.

He had made her a multi coloured salad, with warm bread and some juice.

"Did you make this?!"

“Yeah, I tried anyway.” He smiled.

"It looks delicious." She smiled, scooping up a forkful.

It was nice to see her so happy. He went to return to the kitchen.

"Are you not eating with me?"

“I thought you might want some space?”

"Go grab your food and come join me? Unless you're trying to hide the fact that you made something less healthy for yourself..!" She teased gently.

He laughed, “Yeah, I have chips and everything downstairs.” He returned not long after with his own tray, which was identical to hers.

"I wouldn't have put it past you..!" She laughed, gently poking his stomach as he sat down beside her.

“I’d have bought you some... If I hadn’t eaten them all.” He joked.

"I can tell!" She giggled.

“Alright cheeky... You said you liked me squidgy.”

"I didn't think I had a choice, the way you eat!" She teased gently, snuggling up to him.

“I probably do need to get a bit trimmer...”

"I know some really good keep fit videos you can try..!" She replied brightly between mouthfuls of salad.

He laughed, “I know, I’ve seen you doing that Pilates stuff in the lounge...”

"I thought you were out when I did those!" She blushed.

“I’m not sure I’ll be able to downward dog or cat, like you can!” He winked.

"Why am I not surprised that that's the one you remember.?!"

“What!? I don’t know what any of them are...”

"Except for the one where my arse is stuck up in the air..!"

He smirked, “You do look very good in leggings...”

"You clearly missed the final position of the workout - lie on the floor in a sweaty heap for several minutes..!" She grimaced playfully.

“You look great.” He smiled.

"Hmm..."

Once they had finished eating, he moved the trays. “So when I popped out earlier, I got you something. Close your eyes...” He encouraged her, getting up to go and fetch it.

She narrowed her eyes, her expression one of intruige and confusion.

“It’s okay,” He reassured her. “Close your eyes.”

"It's a good thing I trust you not to trick me..!" She retorted as she closed her eyes.

“Hold your hands out,” He instructed.

Though her eyes were still closed he could tell that she was shooting him a look.

He went onto the landing and brought back a simple gift bag, tied with a ribbon. He placed it in her hands.

She felt it with her hands, her eyes still closed.

“You can open your eyes now,” He told her, settling down on the bed next to her.

She opened her eyes and looked down at the bag, her eyebrow raised. She slowly untied the ribbon.

“Don’t get mad...” He started.

She removed the ribbon and peered inside.

He started to explain, as she reached inside. “So I read some stuff on the internet and I went and bought it because I thought it might help with everything and I wanted you to know I care. About this, about you, I mean. And I don’t always get it right, in fact often I get it completely bloody wrong, but I love you and we’re a team. Please don’t push me out of the team...” His eyes glistened, as his heartfelt ramble stalled.

She placed each item on the bed as she took it out the gift bag. There was a glass water bottle decorated with flowers, a set of light cotton pyjamas and matching eye mask, some vitamin supplements and... "Oh this is clearly 'one for the team'..!" She giggled, running her fingers over the tube.

He flushed red, “There’s herbal tea too!”

"Oh yes! I almost missed that." She smiled, reaching into the bag once more.

“The caffeine thing...” He explained, shrugging.

"Apparently alcohol ain't good either but I'd rather not have to give up white wine unless I really have to!"

“I like when you have wine...”

"That's because I'm easily led astray when I've had a few wines..!" She giggled.

“Are you saying I lead you astray?” He snorted, it was often her.

"Yes! I'm a good girl!"

“Oh I think you’ve had a few naughty moments... That Christmas party... That one night, after the pub... And my birthday!” He recalled a few.

"The Christmas party was an accident, you tripped me over into that hedge after the pub and as for your birthday... Well, I don't have an excuse for that off the top of my head but give me some time and I'll come up with one..!" She laughed.

“I’m sure you will.” He reached for her hand.

She laced her fingers through his. "I seem to recall I did offer to clean the stain out of your trousers for you..!"

He laughed, “So you are taking some responsibility then?”

"Maybe a little. I do admit that loudly telling you to 'get em off!' in the middle of a packed pub probably wasn't my brightest idea..."

He laughed at the memory and then sighed happily, “I can’t tell you how good it is to hear you laugh.”

"It feels good to." She smiled.

“It’s going to be okay you know.” He squeezed her hand.

"It can't be worse than puberty right? Because that was horrific!" She cringed.

“No, it’s going to be much better, because this time, I’m with you every step of the way.”

She smiled warmly at him, squeezing his hand. "I'm sorry I've been so hellish to live with recently."

“I love you.” He bent down to kiss her.

"I'm glad you still do."

“Never any doubt!” He squeezed her tight.

"I never meant to push you away."

“I know, it’s what you do when you get scared...”

"Am I really that predictable..?" She asked with a small smile.

“I’ve known you a long time, I still haven’t found a way of getting you to let me in straight away, but I normally manage it in the end.”

"You're persistent I'll give you that!"

“Fortunately or unfortunately for you, I’m not giving up on you or us. You’re stuck with me.”

"There's no-one else I'd rather be stuck with."

“Good!” He kissed her.

"Not many blokes would do something like this..." She gestured to his gift as they parted and she snuggled up to him.

“Not many blokes feel what I do for you.” He smiled.

"And how is that..?" She asked, fishing for compliments.

“I’d do anything for you Duffy - you hurt, I hurt, you’re sad, I’m sad.”

"You've always been there for me and I can't put into words what that means to me."

“It’s not really a choice, I can’t stop it!” He smiled.

"Even when I've begged you to..!" She teased, nudging him in the ribs gently.

“Because that’s when you need me the most.”

"It pains me to admit you might be right..."

“I am...” He stroked her cheek.

"You're going to dine out on that admission for the rest of time aren't you.?!"

“Pretty much... I did think you were going to go mad when I gave you the gifts, could have gone either way...”

"It probably helps that I've managed to have a good sleep so I'm in a better mood..." She mused, smiling impishly.

“Sleep is the secret then!?”

"I've never been any good when I've not had enough sleep. It's just that nowadays I need more sleep than I used to!" She chuckled softly.

“You’ve been up a lot recently in the night, can’t have been easy.”

"I've tried my best not to wake you, I'm sorry that I did."

“I was worried about you... What happened?” He asked softly.

"Night sweats." She cringed.

“Ahh... That explains the change of clothes...”

"It's horrendous."

“I’m sorry.”

"Not your fault." She shrugged.

“Has everything been okay at work..?” He broached carefully.

"What do you mean..?" She bristled slightly.

“Has it been difficult at work?”

"Has someone complained about me?"

“Duffy... I'm speaking to you as your husband, not your boss.”

"Doesn't sound like it..!" She retorted, moving away from him across the bed.

“Hey...” He ran his hands over her shoulders, trying to get her to relax again. “You’re getting spikey and you don’t need to.”

"I don't like being thought of as not capable of doing my job!"

He kissed the back of her neck, “You're the best nurse we have. No one thinks you're incapable. Especially not me.” He moved his lips slowly, brushing them across her neck.

"So people haven't been talking about me to you behind my back?"

“There’s been a few, but mostly just concerned. They care about you Duf.”

"What did they say?"

“You seem a bit confused, you made a few mistakes, you keep disappearing...”

"Confused?!"

“Just not your usual self. Is that how you feel?”

"I've not felt very well physically but there's nothing wrong with my mind!"

“Are you sure? There was that missing dosage...”

"How many times?! That was not my mistake!"

“Okay.” He left it, he didn’t want to push anymore.

"You do believe me don't you..?"

“I trust you.”

"Good!"

“If it gets difficult, I can help, both as your boss and your husband. I want you to know that.”

She sighed softly.

“Come back over here you.” He asked softly, her back still facing away from him.

She glanced over her shoulder at him, her eyes glistening with tears.

“Come here darling.” He repeated softly, reaching for her hand that lay beside her.

She sighed as she started to cry again, allowing him to pull her closer to him once more.

He wrapped his arms around her, as she rested her head against his chest and cried.

"Bloody hormones!" She muttered between sobs.

He rubbed her back gently and let her cry.

It took several minutes before the tears finally stopped. She kept her head laid against his chest and yawned.

“Sleepy?” He asked, stroking her hair.

"I'm sick of being constantly exhausted..!" She grumbled, yawning again.

“I know... Shall I leave you to sleep for a bit?” He asked her.

"Can't you stay and sleep too?"

He laughed, it was only the afternoon. “I will if you want, I’m not so sleepy, but I’ll stay.”

"I need to find a better way to stay awake..." She mused as she made herself comfortable beside him.

“A walk? TV? Reading?” He suggested.

"Mmm..." She replied as she nodded off.

Charlie lay next to her, grabbing a book from his bedside table.

About an hour later she reawoke.

Charlie had his glasses on and was reading, his other arm was wrapped around her.

"Good book?" She asked softly.

He looked down at her, over his glasses, “Hello you! It’s interesting,” He commented, putting his book mark in the book.

"You can carry on reading if you want..."

“Not if you’re awake.” He smiled. “Fancy a cuppa?”

"Please. I'll have a quick shower and then we can go for that walk you mentioned..?"

“Sure,” He smiled as she climbed out of the bed.

She reached down and picked up one of the herbal teas he'd bought her. "I think I'll try this one first." She smiled, holding it out to him.

He grinned, “Sounds like a plan.” Taking the tea bag from her, he kissed her cheek, “Enjoy your shower beautiful.”

She smiled as she watched him head back downstairs. Maybe everything would turn out OK afterall...


	3. Chapter 3

It had been a couple of months since Duffy had opened up to Charlie. He had been supportive throughout and she was getting better at dealing with the many new challenges she faced. 

They were nearing the end of a long shift, they had just finished with a big case in resus.

Duffy stretched her arms above her head, letting out a soft groan as she made her way into the staffroom, gasping for a cuppa.

Charlie followed her inside. “That was a tough one hey.”

"Yeh, I wasn't sure if we'd be able to get that young lad back at one point."

He nodded, “You were great in there.” He smiled genuinely, she seemed to be regaining her confidence.

"I just did what I'm trained to do..." She shrugged, flicking the kettle on.

“You were the only one who spotted the bruising, suggested the treatment plan and spotted the incorrect dosage. I’d say that was more than just training!”

"Right place, right time." She smiled, blushing softly.

He shook his head, she could never accept a compliment, but was always the first to praise others.

"Would you like one?" She asked, reaching for the mugs.

“I’d love one, thanks.” He sat down on the sofa, rubbing his head, he was tired.

She placed the teabags in the mugs and poured over the boiled water before handing Charlie's over to him.

“Thanks love,” He placed the cup on the table and rested his head on his hands.

She placed her mug next to his and sat down, reaching over to massage his shoulders gently.

He moaned appreciatively. “You have magic hands Mrs Fairhead.”

"And you have very tense shoulders Mr Fairhead..!"

“Too much time in resus!”

"Almost home time now though."

“Yeah, I should go check on Robyn, then finish that paperwork.” He moved forward, sipping his tea.

"Leave Robyn to me." Duffy smiled.

“Are you sure? She’s having a bad week of it, bless her.”

"I'll make sure she's OK."

“Thanks love, what would I do without you!?”

"Eat junk and be forced to do your own laundry..?" She teased.

“I’d be forever working!”

"That too."

“I better go make a start...” He sighed.

"I'll come find you once I've spoken to Robyn."

“Thanks,” He stood up with his cup and kissed her goodbye.

She pulled him back for a second kiss before letting him go.

“See you later,” He smiled back at her, after opening the door.

Duffy went back over to the counter and made a drink for Robyn before going through to admin to ask the younger nurse to join her in the staffroom.

Robyn did so reluctantly, she didn’t feel like talking, but Duffy always had a way of getting her to do what she said. 

“Duffy, I have loads to do.” Robyn complained.

"You've got time to join me for a cuppa and a biscuit surely..?"

Robyn put the file back down, “If you say so.” She sighed.

"They're chocolate biscuits..!" Duffy added mischievously.

Duffy’s comment brought a smile to Robyn’s lips. “Why didn’t you say before?” She smiled, following her into the staff room.

Duffy chuckled as she handed Robyn a mug before retrieving the biscuits from her locker.

Robyn thanked her and settled onto the sofa. “I needed this, thank you.”

"It's been a bit of a week hasn't it?"

Robyn nodded, tears already filling her eyes. “Not the best...”

Duffy placed her arm around the younger woman's shoulders. "Oh pet..."

“I’m okay..” Robyn tried to convince herself. “I keep thinking it’s his loss... Doesn’t make it any easier though does it?” She sniffed.

"No it doesn't. What do you say, tomorrow evening you come over to mine? I'll make some food and we can open a bottle of wine and put the world to rights?"

Robyn looked up at her, “I’d like that.” She wiped her tears away, and smiled weakly at her. “Will Charlie mind?”

"He's working the late shift so we can get drunk and curse men as much as we like!" Duffy replied mischievously.

Robyn nodded tearfully, “Okay.”

"I know it's a cliché and doesn't feel like it now but there's plenty more fish in the sea."

“I’m sorry for getting upset in resus... You and Charlie are always so strong in there...” Robyn sighed.

"Not always. We've both had our fair share of wobbles in there too."

“Have you?” Robyn asked tentatively, she hadn’t seen them.

"Of course we have!" Duffy smiled reassuringly. "We all have our off days. You just need to pick yourself back up, dust yourself down and keep going forwards."

Robyn smiled gratefully, “Thanks Duffy.”

Duffy took a second biscuit and then pushed the packet towards Robyn. "Hide them and save me from myself!" She chuckled.

Robyn laughed too. “I love how you have a secret stash in your locker.”

"You never know when you might need them and if I left them in a cupboard they'd be gone within the hour!"

“Very true! I guess I should get back to it...”

"And its almost time for me to go home and discover what this 'surprise meal' my husband has planned is..."

“Aww, that’s so sweet! Is it a special occasion?”

"Not that I'm aware of..."

“Couple goals, you two are!”

"I'm going to nod and pretend I know what on earth you mean..!" Duffy chuckled.

Robyn laughed, “You know... As a couple you have it all, you’re cute, you laugh together and you’re there for each other. You’re a goal for the rest of us!”

"You say that... Took us blooming long enough to get our acts together!"

“But look at you now...” Robyn smiled enviously.

"Hope springs eternal no matter how old you get!"

“There’s hope for me yet then!”

"You're a spring chicken, you've got plenty of time."

Robyn smiled and tried to take on board what she was saying. “I better go, but thanks Duffy.”

"I'm always here if you need an ear to bend. And don't forget about tomorrow night."

“I won’t, I’m looking forward to it!”

"Me too."

Robyn popped her cup in the dishwasher and went to leave. “See you tomorrow!”

"Take care of yourself Robyn." Duffy smiled as the younger nurse left to head back to work.

Meanwhile, Charlie had been working hard in his office, his endless pile of paperwork reducing some what.

Duffy popped her head around the door having gotten changed out of her uniform. "Need a hand..?"

He looked over his glasses, “I’m nearly done.” He smiled.

"OK." She smiled, entering and crossing the office to his desk, hopping up to sit on the edge of it.

“How was Robyn?” Charlie asked, as he finished his last few charts.

"I think she'll be OK given time. All this stuff with Glen has really thrown her for a loop. I think she genuinely thought he was the one."

“Maybe he is, he just hasn’t realised yet?”

"I suppose time will tell. I've invited her round for a girls night tomorrow."

Charlie smiled at her, “That was a really lovely thing to do.”

"Gives me some company whilst you're working late too."

“Sorry about that...” He’d taken on another shift to cover holiday.

"It's OK. You'll hopefully be back before bedtime though I can't promise I'll be completely sober by then..!" She giggled.

“Why does that make me worried?” He laughed.

"It'll be fine so long as I can remember where my bed is..!"

“And not someone else’s!”

"Last time I ended up in the wrong bed whilst drunk it was your bed..!"

“That’s okay.” He smirked.

"I thought it might be."

“Right missus, I’m just about done here, shall we go home?”

"I'm ready for home." She smiled.

He piled a few of the files to one side, and then stood up. His coat and scarf were hanging on the back of the door. “Then home we shall go!”

"I just need to grab my coat and bag from my locker."

“Okay love, shall I meet you in there?”

"Do we need to pick up dinner on the way home?"

“Depends whether you want to stay in or go out for your surprise meal...?”

"Stay in. It's been a long day."

“I covered both options just in case.”

"You're learning." She smiled, collecting her belongings from her locker whilst he lent against the doorframe.

“I am, options are good. I call and cancel the booking I made just in case.”

"Don't cancel, just move it to Sunday if you can?"

"Really?"

"We're both off Sunday." She reminded him, slipping her arms into her coat.

“Sounds good.” They said goodbye to a number of colleagues as they made their way out of the department.

They'd travelled to work in Charlie's car so she waited for him to unlock it.

Once inside, Charlie started the car. “What a day!” Charlie sighed as he pulled out of the space.

"I'm glad it's over."

“Me too! Do you fancy a take away?”

"Yes."

“Shall I pull in on the way past, or shall we have them deliver later?”

"Might as well grab it on the way past. I don't know about you but I fancy an early night."

He glanced over at her, unsure whether she was being suggestive or just tired. “I’d say the same.” He settled for, pulling into the lay-by by their favourite take away.

"Takeaway, a couple of glasses of wine and then snuggling up in bed." She smiled.

“Same as usual?” He asked, turning the engine off and undoing his seatbelt.

"Yes please."

“Won’t be long!” He climbed out of the car.

Whilst he was inside the takeaway Duffy pulled down the sunshade and inspected her make up, redoing her lipstick.

It wasn’t long before Charlie was back with their food. He passed it to Duffy as he got back into the driver’s seat.

"Smells delicious!" She declared.

“Yeah, I’m looking forward to this - I don’t think either of us had lunch today.”

"I think I managed about two bites of a sandwich before getting called back to resus."

“Can you remember if we have some wine in?” Charlie asked, reversing out of the parking space.

"I think we might have half a bottle in the fridge."

“Will it be okay? Or do you want to stop and get some more?”

"That'll be fine. I'll go shopping for more tomorrow."

“Perfect, then home we go!”

"Before this gets cold..!" She joked.

“Absolutely!” It only took them five minutes to get home from the restaurant.

Heading into the kitchen Duffy gathered the plates and cutlery whilst Charlie grabbed the wine from the fridge along with some glasses.

“Lounge or table?” He asked her.

"Lounge."

He walked through with the wine and glasses, and then came back to help her carry the rest.

"Music or a film?" She asked as they placed everything down on the coffee table.

“Music, then we can chat.” He smiled, going over to the CD player.

She giggled as he put on a jazz CD. "Setting the mood..?" She teased.

He blushed, “Something like that.”

"I remember the first time you played that CD while I was over at your house..."

“You can? Which night was that?”

"Many, many years ago... Was I the only woman you tried that seduction technique on..?"

“Did it work then?” He laughed.

"I slept with you that night didn't I..?" She retorted with a smirk.

“Was it that second time you came around?”

"So you do remember..?" She giggled.

“It’s coming back to me now...” He giggled. “And, yes, you were the only one I played jazz for...”

"Ooh, I am privileged..!"

“I’m glad we’re through that stage...”

"You randomly seducing me..?" She asked, her eyebrow raised.

“Me not dealing with my feelings for you very well!”

"Oh I was just as bad..!"

“I didn’t want to hurt you, but I felt like I did over and over again.”

"You didn't hurt me anywhere near as bad as others did." She whispered, resting her head on his shoulder as he sat down beside her.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, he already knew the pain she had been through. “Hopefully I can make up for any pain I caused you, now we’re married.”

"It was more frustration than pain, especially when you behaved like an interfering old woman!"

“An interfering old woman!?” He laughed.

"Yes!" She laughed.

“Just when I thought this evening was going well...” He teased.

She continued to laugh as she picked up her plate of food.

He tucked in as well, “I’ve been looking forward to this all day!"

"This is delicious!" Duffy exclaimed, her words slightly muffled by the food in her mouth.

“Soo good!” He agreed.

Swallowing her mouthful she held up her glass towards him. "To us." She smiled.

He put his fork down and lifted his own glass, “To us!” He said clinking her glass.

She leaned in to give him a quick kiss before taking a drink.

He decided to light the candles on the table and turn the big light off. Looking over, he snuck a glance at her, her eyes were sparkling in the candlelight.

"So what did you want to talk about..?" She whispered softly.

They had finished their dinner and he pushed the plates onto the coffee table. “Just wanted some quality time with you love...” Her knees were up, so he rest his hand on them.

"I was a bit worried that you were going to drop some big bombshell on me..." She admitted.

“Were you really worried?”

"A little..."

“What did you think I was going to say?”

"That's what I couldn't work out..."

“How are you doing?” He changed the subject.

She shot a look at him in reaction to the conversation change. "I'm OK."

“I haven’t seen you much this week...”

"Work has been so busy..."

“I thought you might have been avoiding me again...”

"No, I've just been wiped out from working."

“Anyway, I’m glad we get to spend tonight together.” He grinned. “I’ve been looking forward to it all week!”

"Me too. That's why I had such an early night yesterday, so I wouldn't fall asleep on you!" She chuckled.

He laughed, moving to sit closer to her.

She sighed contentedly, snuggling up to him.

“There has been something I’ve been meaning to tell you...” He spoke as he held her.

"Oh..?"

“No, don’t worry, it’s nothing to worry about!” He reassured her.

"I'm intruiged now!"

“The post office contacted me and it seems I have an old savings account with them, that’s about to expire...”

"Oh? Was there much in it?"

He nodded, “A lot more than I thought...”

"Bet that was a nice surprise."

“I thought we could use it...”

"Oh?"

“It’s a couple of thousand pounds... I thought we could maybe use it for something for us to enjoy together?”

"How the heck did you forget you had a couple of grand lying about in a savings account?!" She gasped.

He looked sheepish, “I think I started it when I was with Baz...”

"When she was still in Birmingham?"

He nodded, “I guess I thought it would be a good idea at the time.”

"Did you ever consider joining her there? Even for a moment?"

“It crossed my mind. I don’t think she wanted me there... And my heart was always in Holby...”

"Is that so..?" There was a glint of mischief in her eyes at the second part of his comment.

“You know, the hospital and my job were really important to me...” He teased.

"I see..." She smirked.

“There might have been some people I cared about here too...” He winked.

"Anyone I know..?"

“I don’t think so... There was a sexy strawberry blonde at work, who was kind and funny. She was my best friend but I couldn’t get her out of my mind.

"Less of the strawberry these days..." She mused with a smile, her fingers playing with the ends of her hair.

“Still sexy, kind and funny,” He grinned.

"I'm glad you think so." She blushed softly.

His hands had slipped just under the hem of her top, his fingertips tickling her tummy. “So I thought we could spend the money or something for the house or maybe we could go away.” He thought aloud, his fingers distracting her concentration.

"We do need a new toaster..." She replied distractedly.

“A toaster?” He laughed. “I think we might have a bit of money left over!” His whole hand was under her the bottom of her top now.

"Mmm..."

“You’re not listening to me are you?” He teased, his hand stationary.

"You say something..?" She asked, trying to smother her grin.

“I was just saying there would be a lot of money left over after your toaster!” He laughed. “It seems you were a little distracted in your thoughts...”

"You can pick something too then..."

“It’s for us to share. I can afford to buy you more than a toaster!” His fingers were running their way along the sides of her torso. He was enjoying the sensation of her soft skin beneath his fingertips.

She shifted herself slightly so he could move higher, her eyes closing, a look of contentment on her face.

“So now you are ignoring me and falling asleep on me at the same time... Great!” He teased her, his hand moving higher.

"Not tired... Had sleep remember..?"

His hand had reached her bra, and was running itself over the lace.

She moaned softly, encouraging him to continue.

His finger tips traced the skin above the cups. “I love how soft your skin is here.” He whispered.

"It's amazing what body lotion will do..!" She giggled.

He cupped her breast with his hand, squeezing slightly.

She lent into his touch.

Her eyes had flickered open again, and he caught her gaze. “I’ve wanted to be with you all week.” He whispered, as he had an overwhelming desire to kiss her.

"I'm here now..." She whispered.

“It’s so sexy when you say that...” He bent his head to kiss her briefly and softly at first.

She sighed contentedly at the touch of his lips.

He brushed his lips against hers quickly and repeatedly.

"I like that." She smiled between kisses.

“Do you want to take this somewhere more comfortable...?” He asked tentatively, in between his kisses.

"That sounds like a very good idea."

He stood up first, offering her his hand. She was pulling her top back down and fixing her hair, almost nervously.

She blushed, feeling so silly as she took his hand.

He smiled reassuringly at her, “You look beautiful.”

"Remind me in the morning to book you an eye test." She chuckled as he led her to the stairs.

He shook his head, “I know these things.”

"I dread to think what I look like after a run of eighteen hour shifts."

“Well, I think you look gorgeous, and I’m not arguing with you about it,” He laughed.

"Oooh!" She teased, giggling, as they headed upstairs.

Once upstairs, he told her to wait for a moment outside of their room.

She raised her eyebrow at him but did as he asked.

Charlie went inside, shut the curtains, put the little lamp on and got some of their supplies and put them under the pillow. Walking back out, he kissed her again and holding her hand, walked her to the bed.

She looked around trying to see what was different.

“Don’t look so worried!” He smiled, as she sat on the edge of the bed and he sat next to her.

"I'm not, I'm just trying to work out what you've changed."

“I didn’t, just got some supplies...” He leaned in to kiss her softly.

She reached up to stroke his cheek.

He held the side of her neck, as his other hand attempted to remove her top.

"You having problems..?" She giggled softly.

He broke away from kissing her, “Just trying to do too many things at once!” He grinned, achieving his goal.

"You never were very good at multitasking." She teased.

“Cheeky! I can stop you know...” He winked.

"Please don't." She pouted as he playfully removed his hands.

He moved her bra straps off her shoulders, kissing her skin underneath.

She sighed loudly. That felt good!

As he kissed her neck, he reached around her and undid her bra.

"Oh god that feels good..!"

He slid his fingers along her arms as he removed it completely, causing her to shiver.

She looked up at him with complete trust.

He knew that her heart was in his hands, at times like these. Even after all these years, there was always an element of vulnerability on her part. He kissed her gently, trying to convey his thoughts.

She smiled softly as he moved back slightly.

He took his own shirt off to match her and then lay down, pulling her down with him.

Her hair fanned out around her as she landed on the duvet.

Charlie pulled her into a hug, their warm bodies touching.

She snuggled into him.

His hand moved up her body, back to her breast. He teased her nipple as he kissed her once again.

Her hands slid slowly down his stomach.

Their kisses were growing longer and more passionate.

She teased her fingers along his waistband.

“Looking for something?” He joked.

"I think he's hiding..!" She giggled.

“He’s missed you!” He winked.

"I've missed him too."

He kissed her neck down to her collar bone, as her delicate fingers slipped into his trousers.

She stroked him gently.

“There you go...” He whispered, growing harder under her touch.

She moved her other hand to undo his trousers. "Wouldn't want him to suffocate." She giggled.

He wriggled a bit, helping her as she removed his trousers. He had become distracted by her breasts and kissing down towards her nipple.

She lent back slightly so he could continue.

He used his tongue to circle and then lick her nipples slowly.

She moaned softly.

He could tell she was enjoying his actions, as her hand was motionless on him.

She caught his eye, she hadn't felt this good for quite some time.

He held her gaze, as he moved himself to her other nipple.

She continued to watch him, her breath coming in short pants.

She hadn’t been this easily turned on in a while and he found it sexy to watch, his hand ran over her legs and bum.

A hint of nervousness flashed through her eyes.

Charlie noticed and kissed up towards her ear, where he was whispered, “It’s okay, no pressure... Remember.”

She nodded, her heart swelling at his tenderness.

He didn’t know what had frightened her, but he took things slowly, and kissed her for some time.

She tried not to tense as his hand slowly started to tiptoe up her thigh.

He noticed she was almost bracing herself, “Remember you can tell me stop at any time, I promise it’s okay.”

She nodded her understanding.

Inching his fingers slowly higher, he kissed her lips gently. With his other hand he reached under the pillow.

She heard the cap snapping as it opened. She watched as he squirted the contents onto his fingers.

He warmed it by rubbing his fingertips together, before resuming his previous path.

She moaned softly as he gently inserted a finger inside her.

He kissed the spot on her collar bone that she liked him to pay attention to, as he moved his finger very slowly, all the time trying to gauge her reaction.

She moaned softly at the feel of his lips on her neck.

He entered another finger slowly, “This okay?” He asked her.

"Mmm..." She nodded.

He reached back under the pillow with his other hand, “Want to try this as well?” He whispered, holding up a tiny bullet vibrator.

"Where did you get that?!" Duffy giggled. That hadn't been in the bag he'd given her!

“Spotted it in the supermarket... Thought it might be fun?”

"You really can get all sorts with your fruit and veg these days..!" Her giggle morphed into a full blown laugh.

“You can indeed! What do you think?”

"You've got me curious now."

“Have you ever used one before?”

"Not one like that and not for a long time..." She admitted with a blush.

He kissed her, “We don’t have to,” He put it down on the pillow.

"I haven't used one since I came back to Holby because I haven't needed to..." She clarified.

“Oh yeah... Why was that?” He smirked, kissing her again, his fingers caressing her still.

"I found a better alternative." She winked.

“Tell me about this alternative...” He said each word in between kisses.

"Well... It wasn't a new alternative... But it hadn't been an option for far too long..."

“And this alternative... Could make you come?” He continued, kissing down to her breasts again, his fingers moving easily inside her.

"Easily and repeatedly."

“Sounds like a special guy!” His kisses moved lower.

"He likes to think he is..!" She teased, giggling.

“Meanie!” He giggled, before licking a particularly sensitive spot.

She let out a gasping moan.

He took a moment to squirt some more lube on his fingers before resuming. Duffy’s breathing was becoming quicker, and her hands were in his hair.

"So good..!"

It seemed any previous anxieties had dissipated and she was her old self. When he knew the tell tale signs of her getting closer, he reached for the bullet.

"Oh fuck..!" She moaned as he switched it on and ran it lightly over her.

He moved himself, so that his head was by hers, his one hand was holding the vibrator and his other hand controlled the fingers inside her. She wrapped her arm around his shoulders, needing something to hold on to. He kissed her hard.

Her hips bucked against his hand.

He moved his mouth to her ear, as she breathed harder. “I love you baby, you can come whenever you’re ready.” He whispered, before nibbling her ear and neck.

"Want you." She replied urgently.

“You want me inside you?” He almost choked on the words, she hadn’t wanted that for so long, it was too painful and uncomfortable for her.

"Yes."

“Okay,” He swallowed hard, trying to dispel the emotion/relief he felt. He gave her the bullet, while he removed his boxers. He applied some lube and entered her easily.

Duffy rolled the vibrator between her fingers before rolling it over one of her nipples. She gasped softly.

“That looks fun!” He grinned, watching her play, as he thrust into her.

She nodded, panting heavily.

“It’s so good to be doing this again.” He groaned, enjoying being inside her once again.

"So good..!"

He was moving much faster now, her moans spurring him on.

Her other hand moved from his hair to his shoulder.

“Baby, are you close?”

She nodded, panting harder.

She looked desperately at him, as he ploughed into her.

"Oh fuck! Charlie!"

“That’s it,” He encouraged her. She clung onto him, as she reached her peak, shaking underneath him.

Several tears trickled down her cheeks, such was the overwhelming emotion she felt.

“Oh darling,” He wiped her cheeks with his thumb, his own eyes tearing up.

"Thought I'd never feel like that again." She whispered brokenly.

He kissed her tenderly, “I know.”

She deepened the kiss. Her emotion had deepened her desire for him. She tightened her leg around his waist, pulling him deeper.

“You haven’t finished...” He smirked.

"You haven't either."

He smiled, “Fancy changing this up a bit?”

"OK." She smiled mischievously.

“Want me to go from behind or you do fancy a ride?” He asked cheekily.

"I'm told I ride well..!" She giggled mischievously.

“Oh yeah, who told you that?” He asked, lying on his back, he played with himself, as he watched her.

"An old friend..!" She replied airily, moving to straddle his thighs.

“An old friend?” He hoped she meant him, he didn’t like the thought of her with other people. His expression said it all.

"Yes I meant you, you donut!" She rolled her eyes, shaking her head indulgently at him.

“Oh, that’s okay then.” He smiled, resting his hands on her thighs. “I do like to see your body riding above me. I just don’t like to think of you with someone else!”

"I thought I was the only one with green eyes in this house..!"

“You know I’ve always struggled with that you where you are concerned...” He watched as she positioned herself above him and move herself down over him.

"Even now..?" She paused briefly, savouring the feel of him inside her once more.

“Sometimes...” He shrugged.

"You're the one I came back for."

He moaned, at the sensation of her moving and what she was saying. “Oh fuck, I love it when you do that!” She was circling her hips.

"You always were the one."

He reached up to brush her face, “And you for me sweetheart.”

She interlocked her fingers with his, tilting her face to kiss his palm.

There was something so beautiful about their love making, that he had never experienced with anyone else. “I love you with all my heart.” He whispered softly.

She held his gaze, it all felt so perfect. She began to move a little faster, her breathing increased again. 

“Fuck! That feels good. I’m not sure I’m going to be able to last long with you doing that.” He moaned softly, holding her hips.

She grinned impishly at him and continued.

“Duffy!” He gasped, moaning again.

"Oh fuck! Charlie!"

“Duffy!” He repeatedly exclaimed, as her movements became faster. He grabbed her breasts as they appeared near his face.

She let out a loud moan as he fondled them.

“Jesus Christ! You feel so good!” He moaned, nearing his orgasm.

She softly mumbled her agreement, too distracted by the sensations to speak properly.

Holding her gaze and her body, he thrusted hard into her, and grunting her name came inside her.

She gasped his name one last time before slumping forwards to lie on his chest whilst she regained her breath.

“That was incredible! You are incredible!” He gasped.

"Uh-huh..!" She replied breathlessly.

He held her as they lay catching their breath for a few moments.

Despite her comments earlier she found herself growing sleepy in his arms.

“Thank you,” He whispered softly. “Thanks for not giving up.”

"No, thank you for not giving up on me."

He helped her roll next to him, her eyes already closed. “Sweet dreams darling.”

"Love you." She mumbled in return.

“Love you more.” He sighed, his own eyes shutting.


End file.
